© By: Ernesto Ortiz
How many times have you woken up in the morning and think, I am already spent, or say I just can’t get started, how about “I feel drained”.
It is not so much physical energy that we lack, sure must of us can use a little more sleep, or better diet, or a shorter commute. But in truth we are healthier today than at any time in recent history. I can pretty much guarantee that if you long for more energy, the problem is not so much with your body.
Yes, because of the demands and obligations of life we work hard, we are filled with stress, we encounter emergencies in our personal life, family dynamics children in school a relationship that is working just so so and we feel exhausted many times people get into an emotional crisis.
No wonder why so many of us suffer from emotional fatigue, a kind of exhaustion of the spirit, a sense that we are just going through life’s motions…
Have you ever meet an individual that lives a simple life maybe in this country or while traveling abroad that is just exuberant and joyous despite what we perceive to be lack or grim external circumstances of their lives?
How do they get there?
How do they do it?
Most of us grown-ups are seriously fun-deprived, and it shows in our declining energy levels. High-energy people have the same day-to-day grinds as the rest of us, but they manage to find something enjoyable in every situation.
When was the last time that it was ok for you to do certain childish things even though you could look foolish in the eyes of others?
We have lost that FUN part of the self, the self that we had at 12 years old. Go back and remember what you did at 12 years old that brought you fun and pleasure. Think about it and then go and incorporate that into at least one day of your week. Regain your child like fun attitude. Somehow incorporate that fun part of the self into your work.
We all define fun differently, of course, but I can vouch for this: If you lighten up and inject just a bit of it into your day, your energy will zoom.
Everyone’s past is filled with regrets, mistakes and missed opportunities that still cause pain. These feelings are an index of our humanity, evidence that we have heart, conscience and emotions. But from an emotional point of view, they are like a ton of bricks we carry in our shoulders and that keep us from moving forward.
While they can’t just be willed away, I do recommend you give yourself a pat on the back, you have made it this far, honor where you are regardless of what happened in the past. Remind yourself that everyone has negative experiences. But whatever happened is in the past, is in the past and nothing can change that.
Give yourself the gift of therapy with some one that can help you with some cellular memory clearing and reconstruction. Holding on to the memory only allows the damage to continue to the present.
Remind yourself that everyone that had a childhood and has moved through life.
People always talk about finding a passion, but something that exalted can end up being more draining than energizing. That’s why I talk about Chakra cells, mechanical devices that store energy, then give it back to you as needed. High-energy people always have a storage tank, an interest or passionate hobby they connect with, no matter how eccentric or crazy it may be. For Gino, that Chakra cell is kayaking. He loves to go out in the ocean and connect with the marine life the clouds, water and sky. He feels like an explorer who finds the beauty of the ocean and that brings him back life. For me is facilitating and traveling to foreign countries, exploring new cultures and new ways of life, finding an element of risk in the voyage makes it exiting and more like an adventure that keeps my Chakra cells charged up.
If you don’t have a Chakra cell passions find one. Anything fun and absorbing will do, from bike riding to gardening, drumming on the beach, dancing wild and out of control, traveling and allowing yourself to grow. Anticipating the activity can get you up in the morning and get you through an otherwise boring day.
Say you’ve been thinking about starting your own healing practice. Will it be successful, or will it not? Do I have enough training or experience and you mull it over and over again. You talk about it with friends. Or should I go on that trip? I always wanted to go there but…
And that but is the same as the I wish I could but I don’t know that I should.
Having the decision hanging over your head is a huge energy drain High energy people make a choice and don’t look back.
The emotionally exhausted stay stuck, forever vacillating the; I wonder if scenario hangs over your head for month’s even years. Every time you can’t decide, you burden yourself with alternatives. How to break the impasse? Quit thinking that you have to make the right decision; instead, make a good enough decision. Any decision.
Take small steps decide what you are having for dinner without going over and over the menu. That will get you in the ballpark of deciding about your future. In emotional energy land, what matters is ending your ambivalence.
Emotional energy has a kind of magical quality: The more you give, the more you get back. This underscores the fundamental difference between emotional energy and physical energy. With the latter, you have to get it to be able to give it. With emotional energy however, you get it giving it.
But you have to take specific action. Start by asking everyone you meet, how are you? As if you really want to know, then listen to the reply. Be the one who hears, be a good listener. Don’t tell people your life’s store in the first 10 minutes after you meet them, listen instead and be sympathetic.
Most of us also need to smile more often. If you don’t smile at people at the person you love when you see them, you’re sucking energy out of your relationship.
Finally, help another person and make the help real, concrete. Give a massage to someone you love, run an errand for him, or cook her dinner then, expand the circle to work. Try going through an entire day asking yourself what you’d do if your goal were to be helpful rather than efficient.
After all, if it’s true that what goes around comes around, why not make sure that what’s circulating around you is the good stuff?
This are karmic points that go into your unseen bank account that you will withdraw in times of need.
Very little that is truly new occurs in our lives. The impact of this sameness on our emotional energy is gradual, but huge, It’s like a tire with a slow leak. You don’t notice it at first, but eventually you’ll get a flat. It’s up to you to plug the leak even though there are always a dozen reasons to stay stuck in your rut.
Once you recognize that is where you are step out and find someone or a group of people with the same or similar interests.
Take up yoga, join a gym, change your hairstyle, length or color.
Start wearing black jeans or bright outrageous colors. Eventually you may gather the courage to quit your job, get out of the rut, and start that healing business or take that trip.
Here’s a challenge: If it’s something you wouldn’t ordinarily do, do it. Try a cuisine you’ve never eaten. Drive home via a different, scenic route. Listen to music you’d ordinarily tune out. You’ll discover that small gestures pack a powerful emotional energy punch.
So many of the clients in my therapy practice tell me that their lives used to have meaning, but that somewhere along the line things went stale, the joy is gone. The foundation is there, but the urgency is missing.
The first step in solving this meaning shortage is to figure out what you really care about, then do something about it. That’s what meaning is: a heartfelt concern that is woven into your everyday life.
If you have been working just to accumulate money, to have and buy more toys, you will get to the point of feeling that something is missing. Ask yourself, what is my contribution, what am I giving back to the world, to the people?
Embrace and find a meaningful spiritual practice, whatever that may be, from contemplative prayer, the Kabala, Buddhism, Shamanism or the practice of true meditation. Allow the fullness of spirit to descend and support you. In the inner silence you will find the energy that is required for you to take these steps, and infuse more meaning into your life.